Have you ever noticed that when you are about to take on a new challenge, be it a job search or major project at work, your critical inner voice speaks up loudly and says something like, “Who do you think you are, reaching so high and taking on a big challenge like that?” We all have that critical inner voice, and it jumps at every opportunity to tell you that you’re really not that great.
Chapter 6 of Your Fairy Job Mentor’s Secrets for Success dives deep into how to confront this “bully” and disempower it. To be honest, I had to reread the chapter this week because my inner critic was doing a great job telling me that my book really wasn’t that great and that I was deluding myself by thinking it was going to be a best-seller. As I reread the chapter and used the tools to confront my inner bully, its power over me melted.
You see, that voice in our heads can be very tricky because it often sounds like a friend who’s just trying to protect us. I know that anytime I step out of my comfort zone, as I did almost 25 years ago when I started Wisnik Career Enterprises, my inner critic takes a front seat. It begins casting doubt and reminding me of all the things that could go wrong and that are wrong with me.
That little voice is one of our biggest challengers to achieving our goals. For a few days this week, I forgot that it takes a lifelong commitment to confront and shut down that inner critic or else it will stop us from taking brave action.
How do we do this? The first step is to listen to it and recognize that it’s not being protective, but destructive, and to shut it down as soon as it starts spewing its toxic lies. To extricate myself from the self-doubt that my critical mind created, I had to remind myself that vulnerability is a superpower! Our inner critic hates it when we feel vulnerable and wants to prevent it at all costs. To our primitive mind, vulnerability means death and is a sign that we are in danger. In reality, allowing yourself to feel vulnerable means that you are creating opportunities for growth.
So how do we conquer the fear and uncomfortableness when we feel vulnerable? In the book I suggest what the mind hates—ask others for help! When I was in my 20s, I thought being successful would mean I was completely independent and didn’t need others’ help. That’s what my vulnerability-hating mind told me, and boy was I wrong!
Today I know (but occasionally forget) that I will never achieve my most important goals alone. To be successful I need others’ help. So, I sent emails to people I’ve placed and mentored and asked if they could please read the book, post on their social media and possibly write a review on Amazon.
This morning I woke up to 17 5-star reviews on Amazon and the eBook ranked #1 for Job Interviewing!